What Do You REALLY Need

· Posted in Random Musings

I want you to recognize something in yourself. This might be something you resist for just a moment; it might even be something you want to avoid. But being truthful here is a great act of self-love.

I can highlight this for you with one question – What do you need? What do you really, really need?

It’s not just about oxygen, or food and water – I’m talking about your emotional needs as human being. I’m talking about your ego’s needs.

Here’s what I believe to be true.

If you give your Ego what it needs, if you are conscious and truthful about your “core needs” – you will need less of them. I learned this back in the day, from my coaching mentor Thomas Leonard. It was my deepest experience that when I got my needs met, and I chose to tend to myself in the highest fashion, my neediness lessened.

No one wants to look at where they are needy. It suggests a fragmented kind of weakness. But I think the only way to not be needy – is to consciously fill, or get your needs met. So just own it. You have an ego, and you’re needy.

If you don’t fill your needs – your needs can creep up on you and sabotage your manifesting. Why? Because unmet needs are match to scarcity consciousness. Of “not enough-ness.” Of fear.

And what do you suppose you create from that point of attraction?

Think about a little child who isn’t getting their need for attention met. They tend to act out, right? In a multitude of ways. From temper tantrums, to unfair play… they get those needs met in one way or another, often times negatively.

You are just like that child. Even as an adult – if you don’t get your core needs met, you’ll act out too. And, unfortunately sometimes unbeknownst to you, in ways that don’t serve your life.

Often times that looks like chronic approval and attention seeking and validation. Or it looks like anger.

Or it looks like settling. Or, you don’t take chances. Never try anything new.

So my question is: do you know what your basic egoic human needs are?

We typically have 3-5 needs that “run us.” The first one is easy to find. Start here, and continue to pay attention.

Consider some of these basic areas. (While there are hundreds, this is a starting place, to get you tuning in to this.)

To be:

Loved. Accepted. Approved of. Cared for. Comfortable. Secure. Control. Peace. Safety.

Right. Acknowledged. Touched. Heard. Communication. Connection.

Fear of asking for what you need can be tough – we run stories about imposing on others, or fear of rejection, or being not deserving – but today give yourself permission to ASK for what you need from your world, family or loved ones.

Then I want to consider meeting those needs yourself as well. What might that look like?

Today, write this: I recognize I have a need for XYZ. This need is just a need, and I own it. Today I’ll meet that need by XYZ.

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